Over the past three years of my life I feel as though I have spent more time waiting than I have doing any other thing. We waited for job interviews and job decisions, we waited on a wedding and on a marriage, we waited on a new job and a new home, we waited on a new city and a new path and here we are yet again waiting on our very first home. Growing up if I had to pick one thing that was the absolute hardest for me it would have been having patience and WAITING. Oh God knows my faults and knows what I need to work on.
These times of waiting have been extremely difficult but yet I love that I have such clear words from God to take comfort in. Wait patiently on the Lord. Be still and know that I am God. Strength will rise as you wait upon the Lord. These waits have been everything but comfortable each though have been unique in there own way. Some have been filled with so much excitement and anticipation that I could hardly stand the wait. Others have been a walk of faith trusting God to provide and waiting patiently on him. Some have been simply inconvenient. And others have been filled with pain, hurt and confusion, longing for the next phase of life to finally bring renewal and love. And as you can guess God has taught us so much in these periods of waiting. All though at times it felt as though we were sitting in the empty waiting room listening to the clock ticking echo off the walls, just waiting for God to open the door and finally call our names to follow him. Every time when the waiting has ceased I look back and think why did I not wait more patiently, why did I ever doubt, why did I not enjoy the waiting more and why did I not just crawl into my heavenly Fathers arms? He is always there at the end of the wait. The wait was always part of the plan and he was always part of the wait.
As we finish up yet another period of waiting this Friday when we close on our house and our able to move into our own place again I confidently finish knowing that God has refined my heart a little bit more. Every time I look back and know that he smoothed another edge of my rough soul during each wait and that my character has been refined. But the most amazing part of it all is that in the end I always understand my God a little better, I always love him a little more and my Faith always is magnified. God knows me and he knows what this heart needs.